Could there be anyone more annoying than Patrick McEnroe?

Sometimes I think Pam Shriver is more annoying, but then I see McEnroe again, and the contest ends. From his uncombed hair to his poorly tied ties to his "cute" sexism to his relentless platitudes, McEnroe makes me nauseous. Tonight, he showed his ass all over again during a discussion of Sybille Bammer.

Ranked 33 in the world before she came into the Pacific Life Open in Indian Wells, California, Bammer is having a remarkable run. She had a bye in the first round, crushed up-and-comer Anastasia Rodionova in straight sets in the second round, and beat the talented Peng Shuai in straight sets in the third. In the round of 16, Bammer dropped a set, but just barely, to phenom Ana Ivanovic (world no. 14), in a tiebreak, then ran over Ivanovic in the last two sets. Then she took out favorite Tatiana Golovin (world no. 19) in straight sets, winning 23 of her 24 first serves.

McEnroe's contribution to the discussion? "Sybille Bammer--a mother!"

Yes, Sybille Bammer has a little girl. Lleyton Hewitt has a child. Max "The Beast" Mirnyi has two children, Fabrice Santoro has a child, Jonas Bjorkman has a child, Sebastien Grosjean has two children, Tim Henman has a child, and several other less-known ATP players have children. And when one of them plays really well, McEnroe says "Lleyton Hewitt--a father!"

Sure he does.