The Bomgardner-bashing is beneath contempt
The tears of Martha-Ann Bomgardner have triggered another flood--a deluge of nasty, cynical, derisive, mocking, accusatory remarks. Suggestions that Bomgardner should "suck it up" (Imus), that she faked crying (Daily Kos), and that other people have real things to cry about (almost every liberal message board and blog you can think of) have popped up all over the place.
Yes, I agree that if I were married to a duplicitous, Bush-selected right-wing judge, I would cry, too. But that is not the issue. The issue is that some women cry more readily than others, and that--assuming she loves her husband--it is painful for her to hear certain things said about him, even if they are true, and even if she lives in denial about them.
Bomgardner has already been raked over the coals because of her fashion sense (because, after all, isn't that all we ever have to discuss about a woman?) by compassionate liberals on the Web, and now she has to pay for showing emotion. Women always pay for showing emotion, except when they don't, and then they are "cold."
The news media is having a field day with the mean old Democrats who made the little lady cry, yes. But that is not Bomgardner's fault. Leave her alone.
Yes, I agree that if I were married to a duplicitous, Bush-selected right-wing judge, I would cry, too. But that is not the issue. The issue is that some women cry more readily than others, and that--assuming she loves her husband--it is painful for her to hear certain things said about him, even if they are true, and even if she lives in denial about them.
Bomgardner has already been raked over the coals because of her fashion sense (because, after all, isn't that all we ever have to discuss about a woman?) by compassionate liberals on the Web, and now she has to pay for showing emotion. Women always pay for showing emotion, except when they don't, and then they are "cold."
The news media is having a field day with the mean old Democrats who made the little lady cry, yes. But that is not Bomgardner's fault. Leave her alone.
posted by Diane at 11:32 AM
6 comments
6 Comments:
Sorry, she is at fault. She is no teenager or inexperienced soul who has never been in the public eye, but a grown woman lawyer who ought to be able to either keep a stone face in a formal situation, or know when to leave BEFORE crying. There is no good reason that she MUST be there.
A lawyer crying in court? When she is not on the stand or being threatened with disciplinary action? Must be a put-on, taking pointers from Courtroom Theatrics 101.
By
Anonymous, at
1:25 PM
Oops, that was me.
NancyP
By
Anonymous, at
1:25 PM
I agree that if she knew she was going to cry, she should have left. But women do not always know they are going to cry. And if her crime is not leaving in time, she still does not deserve the kind of abuse that is being heaped upon her.
By
Anonymous, at
1:50 PM
"...some women cry more readily than others..."
Well, yeah, that's true. But what's the difference between saying this and saying "some men lose control of their temper more readily than others"? I would expect people to come down pretty hard on a man who'd thrown a public temper tantrum in a similar situation. It's not a bad thing to HAVE emotions, whether it's sadness or anger or whatever; the problems arise when people fail to exercise appropriate restraint in displaying those emotions.
By
Lymphopo, at
2:19 PM
Actually, there is a difference, and it has to do with the construction of women's tear glands. But again, I agree that if she knew she was not emotionally up to the occasion, she should have stayed home.
And I still maintain that the criicism of her is way over the top.
By
Anonymous, at
2:40 PM
Absolutely right -- the heaps of criticism is way over the top. I continue to find it disappointing that so many liberal bloggers can't or won't take the time to construct meaningful arguments, rather resorting (I hope it's resorting) to ad hominem...I find it fascinating how the banner of "liberal" seems to paradoxically provide an excuse to be sexist. On other popular "liberal" blogs I've found plenty of examples of racism and homophobia -- just as explicit as one finds on rabid right wingers's sites (in some cases, moreso). I'm following this horrific trend with intrest, since I'm a writer trained in rhetoric. Anyway, you are right here, 100%. I'm freaked out that you should even have to defend your point. Now that liberals aren't very liberal, what's next. I'll be collecting data, and staying tuned...an interesting trend. (By the way, I'm beyond liberal -- a feminist, and Marxist -- a devotee of critical theory and a published writer. I hate to have to note this at all, but in such a knee-jerk world, it becomes necessary. I never used to append motive or personal/professional history in order to validate myself..sigh...
By
Anonymous, at
1:22 AM
Post a Comment
<< Home