Vatican bans singer because of fear she would promote the use of condoms

Brazilian singer Daniela Mercury has been banned from performing at the Vatican's 2005 Christmas concert because concert officials heard she might openly promote the use of condoms to combat the spread of AIDS. God forbid. Fearing they were going to be Lauryn Hilled, Vatican officials uninvited Mercury.

The Catholic Church advises that the best way to stop the spread of AIDS is through "fidelity within heterosexual marriage, chastity, and abstinence." Just so you know.