I get more dangerous as time goes by

In 2001, I learned from Jerry Falwell that I caused 19 terrorists to fly planes into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. Naturally, I was flattered that he would acknowledge me. Now I learn from Bill O'Reilly that I am a terrorist. I am a member of the ACLU, and according to O'Reilly, we are terrorists because the ACLU has sued Donald Rumsfield for the torture and abuse of detainees in U.S. military custody.

I have now become so evil that the only thing left for me is to become part of the Bush White House. Stay tuned.