Thursday, January 05, 2006

What will happen when God takes it to Pat Robertson?

Today, extremist cleric Pat Robertson made it clear that his "friend," Prime Minister Sharon, was felled by a stroke because he gave away some of "God's land" to the Palestinians. For some time now, Robertson has had an explanation for the illnesses and misfortunes of various people: Feminists, ACLU members, and non-Christians brought about the deaths of thousands of Americans on September 11, 2001; hurricanes have hit Florida because Disney World has "gay days."

Robertson, who is 75 years old, is going to die some day, and if he is lucky, he will die in his sleep of old age and a shrunken brain. But before that occurs, he could have a stroke or a heart attack, or get cancer or a blood disease, or develop some type of dementia, or get hit by a bus or shot in a drive-by incident. If and when one or more of those things occur, shouldn't we be ready with an explanation?

I think we should. God may smite him for his hatred of women. Or his hatred of gay people. Or his hatred of non-Christians. Or his hatred of those who defend our civil liberties. Or those who work for peace. Robertson, by his own definition, is mighty smite-worthy.

Stay tuned.


This is good to know. Since I haven't given away any land to Palestinians, I should live forever, even if I weigh over 300 pounds and never get any exercise.

The truth, of course, is that God smites those who don't watch what they eat and exercise.

By Anonymous KathyF, at 3:28 AM  

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